How To Be A Crazy Struggling Asian

Dear reader,

Anyone else on the struggle bus? Let’s rain some truth on this b*tch. It’s fabulous to pursue what you love, but it’s also f@$#ng hard to be an artist. Instagram @cecechic shows the highlights of my life(OMG! I’m, like, amaze!), but it’s called an image for a reason. My life is not perfect and I never want alienate anyone who may feel like their lives are “less so”. So this post is KIRA: keepin’ it real always. (I only use facebook to share blog posts. Too much social media makes me gassy)

Makin It Rain…or Drought

Acting is a huge investment. Classes, headshots, networking, you name it. “Uh, isn’t someone, just gonna, like, discover me?” Nice try Cindy Crawford(dating myself here), but most of us will be hustling for years. My biggest priority right now is paying RENT. LA is expensive. I live in a cozy, converted living room in Ktown with an adorable roomie. When you love what you do, you need less stuff (except cute shoes, bags, and clothes. fashion whore, loud and proud). Sure, it’d be amazing to own a sweet a$$ home with a pool/hot tub/balcony someday, but that’s not why I’m doing this. Materialism can be the death of art.

May The Odds Be Ever In Your Favor(not)

According to Google, the average unemployment rate for actors hovers around 90 percent. So when some people say: OMG YOU’RE GONNA BE FAMOUS! I want to punch them in the face. They have the best intentions but really don’t get how challenging and time consuming this path can be. Can you imagine any other job where the extent of experience does NOT match the role you’re in? Wrap your mind around that. So like my teacher at Stella Adler says: “if there’s any other job you like to do, do it.” Acting is tough af and I love it.

Did you know auditions require you to be available at any moment? Keeping a 9-5 job is simply not possible if you have any plans for success. I dog walk and teach, but mostly my loved ones support me. Blessed with unconditional love and that’s all I’m going to say here 😉 Everyday, I manifest abundance and believe someday this will all pay off.

Fresh Off The Boat

Constance Wu is #BAE. Her show FOTB is the first Asian American family on TV in 21 years. Crazy Rich Asians is LIT. It’s a double edged milestone that’s empowering and shows us HOW MUCH WORK we’ve still got. Let’s see it as the tip of an invisible iceberg. C.R.A. represents a sliver of our stories. Good news? Audiences want diversity. We can sell the big bucks. In Hollywood, green speaks (cue Awkwafina’af on SNL).

Quick brain-gasm: think about the last show you watched and how many of the LEAD characters were minorities. How many do you count? Check out billboards with diverse characters(not just extras per remake of Beauty and the Beast). I bet you can count them on one hand and that’s generous. Like Maggie Q says, I don’t want to be up for “asian” roles, I want to play interesting characters. P.S. ASIAN PEOPLE: let’s be more outspoken about our invisibility and demand opportunity. Regardless of whether you’re Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Malaysian, Thai, Laotian, Mixed, etc. Support each other and other minorities. United we stand, b*tches. (anyone who denies whitewashing is real probably has similar views on global warming. like, the earth is flat, duh)

Daddy Issues

Relationships with men are never easy, but they’re MUCH better than low self esteem 20’s. I set healthy boundaries with anyone who is toxic. This applies to my family. My dad still sends me texts me about how I should invest in a better, stable, long term career plan. I delete them cuz it just brings me down. Thankfully, my mom is far more supportive. It’s the hardest thing in the world to accept your loved ones for who they are. Only then can we stop expecting validation. Free yourself, loves. Forgive them and open your heart to the people who will embrace you wholeheartedly.(my Oscars speech will include shoutouts to my therapists. No shame in the mental health game!)

Dear reader, like any good parking spot, we’ve got to validate ourselves.

Detach from the negative thoughts and watch them float away like leaves in the breeze. Lean In to positive energy. This is the path to become a Mental Samurai (title of FOX game show hosted by Rob Lowe. We froze our asses of in the audience while watching people try to to be “perfect” by answering trivia in 30 seconds. Nobody won the 10 grand. Quel surprise)

Blessed to building a community in LA. Our faces are different, but are hearts are the same. (p.s. be careful in LA cuz many mofos fake) Whatever you’re passionate about, NOW is the time to start. Next time someone asks me about my 5 year plan, respond…”To be happy. To find fulfilment in the process, rather than the result. Clapping back at the hater-ade, SUP.

Remember: challenges suck balls, but they also offer an opportunity to THRIVE.

Thanks SO much for reading about my pits and peaks. I hope you feel a little bit more inspired and a little less alone. HAPPY MATHA FAHCKIN FRIDAY!

Love and peace,

CeCe Chic

 

How To (Not) Get Kidnapped For A Job

Dear Reader,

2 days ago, I interviewed for a karaoke hostess job on craigslist. At a boba tea place, I met 2 Korean guys in their early 20’s to 40’s (can’t tell with asians) who described the job as someone who sings and entertains the guys at the bar. They told me to join a ‘password protected’ chat on kakaotalk, a texting app popular in Korea. Found it weird but just chalked it up to LA. Sure, I knew there would be less than pleasant drunken disorderly behavior to deal with, but hey, at $120+ per 2 hours plus tip, this hustling artist smelled RENT.

Since the schedule was flexible, I decided to start Tuesday. Around 5:30 pm that day, I rushed to acting class at Stella Adler. In the labryinth of the hallway, I happened to run into my friend who reminded me class was canceled. She invited me to a creative/artist community house party, so DUH, I went. BOOM UNIVERSE SIGN: I canceled the karaoke gig just in case it went late. However, a few hours later, around 8:30 pm, I felt guilty for slacking off so decided to commit to the original plan of working.

I went home to get ready and texted Karaoke guys I’d be coming. One of the guys, a blonde haired Korean, asked if I could meet them at Denny’s, or if they could pick me up. In my blur of getting ready/thinking I could get a free ride, I texted them my address, followed with “what’s the address of the karaoke bar?” They ignored me the first time and the second time I asked, he sent me a random list of karaoke bars. So I wrote back, half jokingly, “Don’t try to kidnap me, I know karate.”

Silence. Then “Hyoon” responded : “You can’t work for us.”

!*@&$)&*(!#&)$ SKETCHY. May we be reminded that the #metoo movement is NOTHING NEW. There is a cultural and spiritual perversion that’s happening within our world, especially in the entertainment industry. The trafficking of innocent men, women and children occurs all the time. It’s not about how smart, careful, or “pious” you are….THIS SHIT CAN HAPPEN TO ANYONE. *pious, ew, hate that word. It reminds me of slut shaming, another abhorrent past time of society. Slut’s my word. Empowerment b*tches!

Remember: there’s a lot of good people in the world, but there’s also a fuckload of evil.

The highest echelons of our society from our politicians to musicians commit horrors for money and fame. Don’t let this dissuade you from your calling. Fortify. Strengthen. Be the spiritual warrior in the world and go forth with fierceness and love. Feel your fears and face them.

To any woman who is new to LA, it is beyond important to NEVER TAKE THINGS AT FACE VALUE AND ASK A LOT OF QUESTIONS. TELL YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY YOUR WHEREABOUTS. VET VET VET.

Positivity should not equal STUPIDITY. Learn from my mistakes, loves. Please.

My carelessness could’ve led to a grave mistake. THANK YOU LIFE FOR TEACHING ME A HUGE LESSON. Na-MAH-stay!

We are all ephemeral. Our words, truth, purpose for GOOD is all we have when fighting against forces who have far more foothold in the public sphere.

Only light can drive out the darkness.

Wholeheartedly,

CeCe Chic